Fridays with Frank: We made our own dog bones!

It’s hard to remember anything that happened before Thursday. But I’ll try.

Eh, not too shabby.

Oh, oh, oh. My human made homemade dog bones for me! With a rolling pin and everything! They have peanut butter and pumpkin (which, I hear, is pretty “basic”) in them. They’re not real crunchy but I like them. (Kristin: You should like them, for crying out loud. You eat poop. How can you possibly stick your nose up at peanut butter and pumpkin?)

I also like to sleep. A lot. I like to cuddle with my human whenever possible, but her blanket will suffice.

We’ve been going for walks in the park, which is so much fun. There’s never anyone there, so I get to go off my leash and run around. I love it.

I suffered a traumatic injury on Thursday. I sprained my ankle. I say “traumatic,” because now I have to stay in my crate All. Day. Long. It stinks.

So I was doing donuts (yum, donuts) around the yard, like a “nut,” as my human says. I rolled my paw while taking a corner and, wow, did I let out a shriek. I was still limping and whining a few hours later, so we went to the ER! Neat! My human liked the doctor a whole lot and said she was a genius. I’m pretty sure it was because of her British accent. But nevertheless.

See that mark on my nose? It’s from the cat. Ugh.

I didn’t need to get X-rays, which was a relief. I did, however, get my temperature taken. And not under my arm or in my mouth, if you catch my drift. Blech.

So now I’m taking an anti-inflammatory and Benadryl to keep me relaxed and calm. I can’t complain, though…my human “hides” the pills in cheese, so there’s that. I can’t believe she thinks I don’t know there’s a pill in that wad of cheese. Sheesh.

Plus I’m on crate rest so I don’t aggravate the injury. No walks for 4-5 days! Boo! To make up for it, I get carried around everywhere because I’m not supposed to walk. Ha!

By the way, here’s the homemade dog bones recipe, if you have an afternoon to kill.

Homemade Dog Bones with Peanut Butter and Pumpkin

My human spotted this recipe for homemade dog bones at Damn Delicious and was so anxious to try it, she actually went out and bought a rolling pin. Yep, she didn’t even own a rolling pin. Shame, shame.

Now, because my human had never even used a rolling pin before, she figured why not go all in and make a double batch? Makes sense, right? She also fiddled with the recipe as she went along, kinda doing the whole trial and error thing. So, you might need to adjust here and there, based on your preference and whatnot. Right? I think so.

Ingredients

• 1 1/3 cup pumpkin puree
• 3/4 cup peanut butter
• 4 large eggs
• 5 to 5 1/2 cups whole wheat flour, or more, as needed

Preheat the oven to 350 degrees F. Line a baking sheet with parchment paper or a silicone baking mat; set aside.

In an electric mixer fitted with the paddle attachment, beat the pumpkin puree, the peanut butter, and the eggs on medium-high until well combined.

Gradually add the flour, about 1/2 cup to a cup at a time. You don’t want flour flying all over the place, am I right? The mixer will need to be on low speed, but you probably knew that already.

Continue mixing (and adding flour by the 1/4 cup) until the dough is no longer sticky. It’s gonna be messy, trust me. Well, anyone who has ever handled dough most likely knows that. My human didn’t. Because, ya know, she’s 44 and never used a rolling pin. What the hell.

After kneading the dough several times (my human wasn’t sure how it was supposed to look, so she just kept going at it), start rolling. Don’t forget to flour your surface!

Not too much flour, though, like she did. Oy vey. You’ll want the dough to be about 1/4 thick. Looks good to me. Moving on…

Use a cookie cutter to cut the dough into your desired shapes. Anything will work, really, but you want it to be practical as a dog bone. Luckily, my human found a set of dog bone cookie cutters on clearance at Home Goods. Score! So my homemade dog bones literally look like dog bones. Yours can too…if you get the right cookie cutters, like this pet-themed Wilton Cookie Cutter Set. Very cool.

Depending on the thickness of your dough and the size of your cookie cutter, you could get a few dozen homemade dog bones or several dozen. She went with the several dozen (roughly six dozen, give or take). Yay me!

Place the baking sheet (that you lined with parchment paper, right?) in the oven for approximately 20 to 25 minutes. Bake until the edges of the bones are golden brown.

So how did they turn out? Not too bad, especially since it was her first time using a rolling pin. She wound up baking them a tad more than 25 minutes and they still didn’t get crunchy. As a result, my homemade dog bones are kind of chewy, which is OK, because I like them like that, too.

Next time we’ll probably make them a little thicker and try for more crunch. (Kristin: I’m sorry, did someone say “next time”?)

These homemade dog bones are generally healthier than most of the run-of-the-mill dog treats you’ll find at the store. And, they’re cheaper; after all, you only use four eggs, half a can of pumpkin puree, less than half a jar of peanut butter, and some whole wheat flour. So we did the math and figured this batch cost about $3.65. That’s a huge savings, plus you’ll feel good about what your feeding my furry friends.

On a side note, the original recipe states that these have a shelf life of 3-5 days and recommends freezing a portion of the bones to keep them fresh. If you make this recipe (which yields double the original recipe), you should probably freeze a good portion of the batch.

This post contains affiliate links. That means if you click on it, you will help my human keep me stocked with homemade dog bones. Yum!