Fridays with Frank: Good news and bad news

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German Shepherd Puppy Raincoat

If she thinks I’m going ANYWHERE with her dressed like this? She’s lost. her. mind.

Bad news: My human, in an “a-ha!” moment, bought me a raincoat. A raincoat. It has duckies on it. Is she serious with this? I’m not a poodle, for crying out loud. Wearing this will seriously kill my street cred. I absolutely refuse to leave the house in this thing.

Good news: In an interesting twist, it rained the day she got this. And yet, she took me out five or six times without putting it on me. The closet full of handbags she doesn’t use is starting to make more sense.

Dog Squirrel Toy

This squirrel doohickey is supposed to be “educational.” Oh, she must have been a blast when her kids were little.

Good news: My human, apparently in a moment of guilt over the ducky raincoat, bought me a box of toys and treats. It was like Christmas, or so I’ve heard. My favorite is this squirrel toy. My human explains to people in great detail how this is an educational game and it will “exercise my brain.” Oh yay for me.

German Shepherd Puppy Ears Stand Up

As you may notice, both of my ears are standing up. You might also notice the couch I’m leaning against, which is new. And “off-limits,” whatever that means.

Bad news: My human got new furniture. It is so big and comfy LOOKING. I wouldn’t know because everyone freaks out if I even put my paw on it. What the hell, people? You can lay on the couch and I can’t even touch it? Jerks. (Kristin: It’s brand new furniture. I will not… Ya know, I’m not even going there. It is what it is.)

Good news: My right ear stood up! Both of my ears are standing straight up. Whew. That was close. My human was starting to panic over my ears. At least, I think she was. I found “how to make german shepherd ears stand up” in the Google search history. Fair to say, “Crisis averted.” (Kristin: Look, I just wanted you to look like regal. A floppy ear on a Shepherd? Just no. Not on my watch.)

German Shepherd Puppy Mr Bill Toy

Good news: One of the toys in my box of treasures is this doll. My human already named it Mr. Bill. Anytime she’s annoyed, all I need to do is make this thing talk (it screams “Oh no!”) and she’s amused. It’s almost too easy. (Kristin: If you like this Mr Bill doll, you can get it on Amazon. (that’s an affiliate link so I can make a few pennies to keep this puppy knee-deep in dog toys) You could also get Mr Bill and Gumby — which I wish I’d seen before buying Mr. Bill by himself.)

You’re probably wondering why there’s a lot more good news than bad news. I’m a dog. Enough said. Don’t miss last week’s Fridays with Frank (or next week’s).

 

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